lundi 29 décembre 2008

My ex sucks.

My friend Alcibiades has now made his first post. So all characters are now in place. Except as of now, it's only a "male tragedy", so that's very gay. It is therefore high time for me to prove to you that I'm as straight as an arrow, and that once, I was infatuated with a woman.

The woman name is of no importance. What is important is that she is a woman, and as such can not be trusted.

We did meet on an Internet chatroom. These things are really nifty new technology, and I am quite sure "Internet chatting" is bound to become big in the following years. Back then, she was the girlfriend of my bestfriend. So the best we could do was cybersex. Then she dumped her new boyfriend for me, the guy she met on IRC. Then she dumped for a guy she met on Facebook.

It was after that that I realized that she probably made up an abortion, drug user past, and other cool things that make you look like a complicated yet interesting character.

So my ex sucks.

I now realize this was vastly uninteresting. But hey, this is a blog on the Intarweb ! Besides, I have to leave a chance to my friend Alcibiades to appear to be a more interesting character than me, by temporaly looking boring.

Still, I felt like it was necessary to tell you where I go from, right after I told you where we intend to go to. After all, things can't get any worse than they were.

It appears that I will be meeting real women tomorrow. Who knows what awaits me ?

dimanche 28 décembre 2008

I am ... introducing.

Good evening.

What you probably are thinking right now is "Hey, I just found another blog. I am starting to really get the hang of this Internet thing.". So before I start , I would like to congratulate you for your mastery and your technological prowess.

Sadly, you will quickly realize that there are more than one or two blogs out there. The word is there are currently at least DOZENS of them. So I feel it is my duty to make sure you stay and do not run to the competition. Because this blog is better, and because if we get a lot of readers,
it is very possible (though unlikely) that we get laid.

Lots of people make blogs to tell the world they just got laid, but how many do make blogs SO AS TO get laid, I ask you ? Most of them, yes. But that's beyond the point.

My name is... Just call me Diogenes. And my buddy, you will call him Alcibiades. I am French, he's South African (worry not, he's white and without AIDS). We are not here to argue upon which is better.

For some reason, Alcibiades and I couldn't help but notice that our lives appear to be connected. We got our one and only girlfriend (one for each of us, you perverted mind) at around the same time, and lost that significant other only a few weeks apart.

Many miles distance us, but one thing gets us close. Now that we did taste the pleasure of the flesh, we want to get back at those ASAP.

Finding love wouldn't be too bad either.

But who will win this new kind of "first pass the post" race ? I, the sophisticated Diogenes, or him, the ... equally sophisticated Alcibiades ? We decided it would be of your general interest that we keep you informed on our progress. We are sure you are going to enjoy the ride. Also, we would like you to send us beloved emails to support your favorite candidate.

If one of you naughty girl reader wants to cheat and have sex with one of us on the spot, please send us TWO emails.

I now leave the virtual keyboard to my buddy, Alcibiades, and I can't wait until he's giving it back to me so that I can tell you why my ex sucks. Metaphorically.